New Friends (Halloween Edition)
No medical device of mine is going to remain plane. The oxygen tank, unfortunately, gets replaced too often to personalize in any meaningful way.
But it's Halloween at Dollarama, finally, so my memento mori skulls are out. Three little charmers adorn the front, with a light pattern that is supposed to (and mostly does) look like a spider web. I am excited to add a couple stickers in the morning (bearing in mind its a loaner and that I don't want to ruin other people's still too much).
The important thing, for me, is that while my physical form continues to be buffeted by the cancer and the chain reactions it's begun, I remain silly. I remain whimsical. And I, even though I haven't properly eaten since July 5th, still want to talk about food.
I'll succumb, eventually, and I'll go down dreaming of the 40 Creek whisky barbacue sauce chicken wings from Cellerman's Ale House circa 2018. Because I've fought this monster for years now, and I just want a snack of those wings, of civiche I had in Miraflores District in 2012, Domino's pizza as it first tastes out of the box, just a little too hot to eat but you can't help yourself (Canadian, in this dream), the butter chicken poutine you used to be able to get at The Bombshelter Pub, the double pulled pork poutine (order a bibimbap for Alicia and another for yourself or you'll regret it) from Minji's, onion rings from a local convienemce store that just melt away as you eat them, a bacon cheeseburger from Lucky's on Highway 17 and, because I'm not unreasonable in my dreams, coarsely diced tomatoes, salter and peppered, eaten as is.
The Cancer could still take these memories and desires from me, but for now they're safe. And with these absolutely delicious memories, I am safe.
And writing this list was so, so relaxing for me. I'm in such a better spot having recollected something important to me, in a way I hadn't so far. Pleasant dreams.