Cancer Selfies

Thursday August 17, 2023

Treatment on pause

This isn't even an anniversary I remembered, but on this day in 2022 my partner and I sat with the surgeon I'd been seeing for my abdominal pain and had all our worst fears confirmed by the results of test after test. And you know what? It's fine. I forgot. My partner and I went to the Toronto Zoo, not to mark time but because it's a fun way to spend a summer day.

Apparently the beaver at the zoo has passed away, and that hit me much harder emotionally than August 17 ever could. The beaver wasn't the fattest or roundest of the fatrounds, but they slept right against the glass window that opened into their lodge, so you could always get a good view. The beaver was probably my favourite exhibit.

I have no appointments in the next month. I've grown used to seeing someone every week or two. It's honestly become part of my identity. I'm not upset about it, obviously, but it's still weird. I've been busy, and my strength has been returning, which is also nice.

A man short hair and bushy facial hair sits on a restaurant patio

At a restaurant in Balm Beach

A man short hair and bushy facial hair stands in front of a sign reading "Tiny Marsh" on the side of a weathered wooden building

At Tiny Marsh, looking for water fowl

A man short hair and bushy facial hair reclines on a folding chair

Relaxing in my yard

A man short hair and bushy facial hair sits on a rock with more rocks in the background

Balm Beach breakwater

A man short hair and bushy facial hair sits on a rock with more rocks and a small building in the background

Balm Beach breakwater

A man short hair and bushy facial hair stands in front of a large machine riding on train tracks, most of it is not in frame

At the Big Chute Marine Railway

A man short hair and bushy facial hair stands in front of a chain link fence protecting a large transformer, a sign that reads "Danger high voltage, no tresspassing"

I'm a big fan of hydro

A man short hair and bushy facial hair pokes his head above a sign that reads "School House" done in an old style

At the Coldwater, Ontario, museum

A man short hair and bushy facial hair excitedly stands in front of an old steam powered tractor

Steam tractor (at the Coldwater Museum)

A man short hair and bushy facial hair stands in front of a huge apple tree, looking shocked

So many apples (they're pretty tart though)

A man short hair and bushy facial hair sits next to a woman with a short rainbow mohawk in front of pink flowers

My partner and I at the Toronto Zoo

A man short hair and bushy facial hair sits next to a woman with a short rainbow mohawk in front of yellow and red flowers

My partner and I at the Toronto Zoo

A man short hair and bushy facial hair sits in front of yellow and red flowers

If there was ever a real life fire flower

A man short hair and bushy facial hair stands in front of a large sculpture of a polar bear made out of plastic waste

A bear made of garbage